Through our new blog series, He Said, She Said, we’ll be telling your stories. We aim to highlight the (mostly) unintentionally biased language that is often used in the workplace towards women. These are real stories from professional women about their everyday working relationships with their male counterparts.
6 Life Lessons Learned From Leslie Jones’ Success Story
“I’m not perfect, but I’m starting to get comfortable, like a sweater you want to wear all the time.” — Leslie Jones
If the name Leslie Jones doesn’t ring a bell, don’t think twice before checking out the newest Ghostbusters movie which debuted in July, a comical film from ‘98 called Wrongfully Accused, or even better — take a reach into her archives on Saturday Night Live to find Jones at her best, making laughter happen.
However, life isn’t always so laughable as an African-American woman navigating a rather-segregated, predominantly-male career field. Ms. Jones never ceases to inspire us with her blustering courage and vibrant originality, revealing how being a badass with passion can get us places in life.
1. It’s not what you say, it’s how you say it.
“People get hung up on writing smart shit. To me, it’s more about performance.” — Leslie Jones
Of course it’s important to know the material before presenting or performing, but often times we become hyper-concerned with having the hardest-hitting line or most intelligent response. In reality, confidence is key and an honest remark can go a long way. If we believe in what we say, others will be compelled to jump on board too.
As comedian Marc Maron said in an article featured in The New Yorker, “She has a presence, when you see her live, that is extremely rare and honestly, it has very little to do with what she’s saying. The first time I saw her, I was blown away, and yet I couldn’t tell you a single one of her jokes.”
2. Closed mouths don’t get fed.
To achieve our dreams, we must let go of our fears and whatever is holding us back. Believe it, feel it, live it and SPEAK UP. Ask for help when necessary, the worst they can say is no (and many times, they won’t).
A fellow ‘80s comic who was far beyond Jones’ comedic status when they were both touring in the late in the decade, Chris Rock, saw her perform live again in 2012 after her initial impression nearly 30-years before.
As recorded in Ready For Prime Time, Rock told Jones after her show, “You were always funny, but you’re at a new level now.”
Jones boldly and with direction responded, “You’re right,” she said. “But I’m not gonna really make it unless someone like you puts me on.”
Rock appreciated her audacity and took a chance on Jones, adding her to his list of funny people. Soon after, Jones’ name began to fill the comedy scene of Los Angeles.
3. Know your audience.
What sells one person may turn another away. It helps to feel out the audience before making bold propositions. Seek to understand their personal values and mentalities. Modify your tone and argument accordingly, then speak with mindfulness and purpose.
“I can look into a person’s eyes for one second and go, ‘Don’t fuck with him — that’s somebody who won’t get over what you’re about to say’,” Jones told Andrew Marantz.
4. The path to success is not always linear.
Just after her decision to leave college and pursue comedy, Jones ran into a writer’s block and found herself struggling to develop new sets. After pondering friendly advice, Jones daringly took a 6-year leave from performing. In the meantime, she took up work as a cook, a cashier, and as a waitress.
“I was the funniest waitress Roscoe’s Chicken and Waffles ever had,” she said in an interview with Marantz. “Customers would be, like, ‘Didn’t I just see you on BET?’ I’d be, like, ‘Yep. Breast and a wing or leg and a thigh?’”
Sometimes straying from the beaten path can help us gain other practical life experiences. In whatever we do, we will find lessons within the journey. Jones’ hiatus gave her time to experience life from a new perspective and develop literature from those experiences. Eventually, her divergent path enriched her career by bringing her to a new opportunity with BET’s “Comic View”.
Life’s a journey — embrace every opportunity with an open mind.
5. Don’t let them steal your sunshine.
After the premier of Ghostbusters in July, Jones was faced with extreme hate tweets which pushed her to leave the Twitter-verse. Online trolls sent racist comments along with pornographic images and heartless memes as described in The New York Times.
“You have to hate yourself to put out that type of hate,” Jones tweeted in response to the harassment. “I mean on my worst day I can’t think of this type of hate to put out.”
Jones has experienced many racist and sexist slurs for the better part of her career. In late July, Entertainment Weekly reported Jones’ strive for peace in the face of negativity — choosing to send out love and positivity with “hug someone”:
“Hurting people hurt people. Most of these people I don’t think they believe in the stuff they say. It’s just a lot of hurt, hug someone. We have to start there. So I won’t answer the trolls with hate anymore just love. And then block and report they ass lol. Won’t do hate anymore.”
6. Love always; love yourself.
Jones told The New Yorker that though she still has extended family in Memphis, her mother, father, and brother all died within the past few years.
“When death touches you that close, you say to yourself, ‘It’s time to start liking who the fu** you are,’ ” she said. “I’m not perfect, but I’m starting to get comfortable, like a sweater you want to wear all the time.”
After 25-years of building her confidence and career, Jones has made it through every trial and tribulation by staying true to herself, believing in her dreams and taking badass, courageous leaps which opened doors leading to her undying vision of success.
Whatever we decide to be, let us be that well. Let us follow our dreams, be audacious, free our spirits and define ourselves.
8 Things You Never Knew About Michelle Obama That Will Awe You
"Michelle Obama" by Gage Skidmore is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.
When great things come to an end, we tend to gain a deeper and clearer sense of appreciation than ever had before. With the 2016 election just around the corner and who knows what to follow, here’s our invitation to take a moment and give a much-deserved round of applause (and new found respect) to our down-right inspirational First Lady.
Not just our First Lady – A young mother, social service hero & private sector lawyer.
The following are 8 reasons to be awed by Mrs. Obama -
1. Michelle (and her older brother) skipped the 2nd grade.
Michelle was born into a Chicagoland family and raised with value placed on education. By the 6th grade, Michelle enrolled in a gifted student program and began taking advanced French & Biology courses.
2. Michelle was Barack’s mentor while he was a summer intern at the Chicago office of the law firm Sidley Austin.
He often expressed his adoration for her while she flattered him with not a glance in return, as she thought it would be inappropriate in their work setting. It wasn’t long before Michelle relented and Barack turned this hot mamma into Mrs. Obama. Two years post-internship, they were pronounced husband and wife.
3. First Lady, Second Degree.
Not only was she the first African-American first lady upon Obama’s Election Day victory in 2008, she also became the third ever with a post-graduate degree.
4. TWO Ivy League degrees – let me restate that. TWICE the Ivy League, TWICE the degree.
Mrs. Obama attended Princeton University (like her older brother), graduating cum laude in 1985, and went on to earn a degree from Harvard Law School in 1988.
5. Michelle wasn’t always sold on the idea of Barack becoming president.
Having two young daughters, Malia born in ’98 and Sasha in ’01, Michelle often had to juggle the demands of motherhood and the working-woman life while Barack was away in Springfield (IL – the capital) tending to business. When Barack decided to enter the presidential race shortly after, Michelle had concerns that it may take away from family time and jeopardize their daughters’ experiences early in life.
“When I get up and work out, I'm working out just as much for my girls as I am for me, because I want them to see a mother who loves them dearly, who invests in them, but who also invests in herself. It's just as much about letting them know as young women that it is okay to put yourself a little higher on your priority list.”
6. Once she realized the campaign could be of advantage to their family and benefit of the nation, Michelle jumped on board and sought to tie her own agendas to her husband’s larger legislative goals.
"My first priority will always be to make sure that our girls are healthy and grounded," Michelle said. "Then I want to help other families get the support they need, not just to survive, but to thrive."
It was Michelle who brought forth motives to support military families and encouraged healthy eating across the nation, in efforts to solve the epidemic of childhood obesity. In her valiant surges, our fine First Lady co-founded the Joining Forces program to expand educational and employment options for veterans and to raise awareness about the difficulties plaguing military families. Meanwhile, launching the Let’s Move! Initiative to promote healthy eating and physical activity. Michelle also established the first community-service program at the University of Chicago as Dean of Student services before embarking on the campaign trail.
7. She's best mates with Prince Harry.
Both are committed to making us confront uncomfortable truths about the world (while providing genius insights and solutions) in order to make our planet a better place to live, and boy do they do the job well.
8. She’s 52. She looks incredible.
“Women in particular need to keep an eye on their physical and mental health, because if we're scurrying to and from appointments and errands, we don't have a lot of time to take care of ourselves. We need to do a better job of putting ourselves higher on our own "to do" list.”
Michelle continues to motivate us as women, as Americans, as human-beings.
“You may not always have a comfortable life and you will not always be able to solve all of the world's problems at once but don't ever underestimate the importance you can have because history has shown us that courage can be contagious and hope can take on a life of its own.”
Sources:
http://www.biography.com/people/michelle-obama-307592
http://www.history.com/topics/first-ladies/michelle-obama
http://thetab.com/us/2016/06/02/michelle-obama-role-model-america-needs-9218
http://www.marieclaire.co.uk/blogs/545340/and-here-s-why-michelle-obama-is-a-total-inspiration.html
The workshops are coming! The workshops are coming!
I have a secret to tell you.
When you start a company, there are an overwhelming number of decisions to be made. And somehow… even the ones that seem simple leave you unsure. We have made a lot of changes to Gild since we began a year and a half ago. Some have been wins, some… not so much.
But every step of the way, we have learned. We learned some basics about what our customers like and what they don’t like, and we learned that sometimes customers can be tricky. We learned that sometimes being the first female team to go through an accelerator can have its unique challenges.
But more importantly, after crafting with over 1,300 women, we learned that we are not alone in those challenges.
And while that is comforting, it is also disturbing. Hearing the stories of the challenges women face in the workplace made us ask ourselves:
What can we do to help?
With that question, we made the first decision for the business that truly felt like a no-brainer. Gild Collective now offers creative workshops focused on women’s leadership in the workplace.
We’re coming into offices (or offsites!) and guiding groups through discussion and exercises that focus on the issues that deserve exploration and action:
- Building confidence
- Fostering mentorships & relationships
- Overcoming unjust moments
Each workshop ends with a creative project that not only serves as a bonding experience, but also gives each participant a takeaway that they can wear or display to remind them to live and lead with greater confidence and passion.
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So that’s it, the workshops have arrived! If you think your organization could benefit from a little heart to heart on women’s empowerment, reach out. We’d love to work with you. And now, I shall leave you with some videos detailing even more of the who, what, why, where, how of it all.
Remember, you are amazing. Go take on the world!
What I'm Reading: The Confidence Effect
I bought this book because confidence has always been one of the key components to the Gild mission. From day one, we knew we wanted to encourage confidence in women through creativity and community. And now, as we continue to make changes to our business, instilling confidence in women–especially those in the workplace–is always top of mind. It’s something I consistently struggle with, even as I work to help others feel like they can take on the world.
“I’d like my crayons back, please.”
Everyone is born creative; everyone is given a box of crayons in kindergarten. Then when you hit puberty they take the crayons away and replace them with dry, uninspiring books on algebra, history, etc. Being suddenly hit years later with the ‘creative bug’ is just a wee voice telling you, ‘I’d like my crayons back, please.’